Tips for Successful Dating Correspondence
Setting up an online dating profile may be easy for you, but the most difficult part is yet to come. What if you find someone you like and you wish to know them better? How would you approach them and how will you talk to them? Remember that even if you're a man or a woman, there is no harm in taking the initiative to talk to someone you like on a dating site. The important thing is to make the right moves and maintain contact long enough, so that you eventually win him/her over. Here are a few handy tips to help you find success in your dating correspondence.
Begin with an email
The main goal when establishing contact with a potential date is to get a response from them. That's why sending an email can be an ideal option because it allows you to take your time and think about what to say. Leave instant messages for later, when you have exchanged a few mails with them. Try to express yourself to the extent that you get their interest while leaving it open-ended for them to respond. Avoid writing long emails because not many people find it interesting to read long, personal mails unless they know the person well.
Go for charming and short when writing your emails, just like you would flirt with someone in person. No matter what happens, never barrage one person with multiple emails. Instead, keep up with their pace to avoid scaring them away.
In your first email, it's important that you write a bit – but not too much – about yourself. Never pour your soul out or reveal too much about your personal problems when writing an introductory mail for a potential date. Mention what you like about him/her, so that you keep them involved in the mail.
Be honest
Whether it's with your age, personality, career, or anything; always be up front about it when it comes to online dating. Even if he/she really likes you for the person they think you are, the truth is going to come out eventually as you get to know each other even more. Instead of lying and risking the failure of a potential relationship, answer questions directly. Even if you're uncomfortable discussing topics that are too personal such as a divorce or a dysfunctional family, let them know how you feel.
Don't make it all about "you"
A huge mistake many people make when trying online dating is that they tend to go on and on about themselves. This means they also make the mistake of revealing too much information to the extent that the other person loses interests. Remember, it's not always about you and you need to show genuine interest in the person with whom you're corresponding. Before sending that first email, make sure you read their profile and choose from talking points. For instance, you could be sharing the same interests in pets or books. Use that to your advantage in your email to help you make a great first impression.
Be friendly but respectable
One of the biggest "no-nos" when you're trying to get to know someone you like on a dating site is being overtly sexual. Avoid coming on too strong. If you're looking for a serious relationship, find something "deeper" to comment on than just their profile photos. For example, come up with a talking point based on something you read in their personal description. Don't hesitate to ask questions but avoid asking too many, so he/she doesn't feel "interrogated".
Being pretentious is "a crime" when it comes to online dating. This makes it crucial that you sign your email with your real first name. There's no need to reveal your full name if you're uncomfortable about it.
In case of disconnection
Be realistic. Not everyone you meet online will want to reply to your email. The worst thing you could do after failing to get a reply from someone you like is to send other mails with questions like "Why aren't you replying to my mail?" Never take disconnection personally because the other person has a different routine and schedule. Maybe they're busy or maybe they met someone already. There are also a few people who might be dragging you along without any intention of taking things further.
The best way to move on from disconnection in online dating is to continue your search and try your luck with someone else. Who knows? The right man or woman could be just a click away.